Tag Archives: Grandma O’Bryant

Names and why they be what they be

We had an assignment on the Cochran family blog to write about what inspired the choices we made in naming our children so I thought I’d share what I wrote here as well.  What I thought would be a short post, turned into a rather long one.

Our first boy was going to be David Hyrum Cochran.  I still like that name, but after I got pregnant, Zach had changed his mind about the name and we had to start all over with ideas.  We used to discuss names in the car and I specifically remember that we were driving down I-15 when one of us came up with the idea to name our son Isaac.  IMG_9301I think it was my idea, but I think that Zach thinks it was his idea.  We thought the meaning was perfect since it seemed like we were finally getting the promised blessing of having a child after a long wait, just like Abraham and Sarah in the Bible.  The name means “he laughs” in reference to the joy that Abraham and Sarah felt when they found out they were pregnant.  Later when I read the scripture again, it seems like they were laughing because of how old Sarah was when she was pregnant, but for me it will always be about the joy.  We thought we’d call him Ike, but we never have.

In all of our names we discussed, there were several people we wanted to honor in our son’s name.  We considered using a grandfather’s name.  We also considered adding a name to honor President Hinckley, but at first we ruled out both Gordon and Hinckley.  Obviously we changed our minds and gave him the middle name Hinckley.  President Hinckley was the prophet during most of the important things that happened in our lives at that point and we felt impressed and inspired by him.

Charlotte’s name came from Zach.  I was initially opposed to the name because of a strong 4.26.10 playing outside (1) connection I had with that name and the story of Charlotte’s web.  We continued to discuss the name and the association softened enough that I started to really like the  name.  I liked that it was unique and still recognizable.

I think I came up with the middle name.  I remember thinking about family names and wanting to honor Charlotte’s grandmother by giving her the same middle name.  At that point I didn’t realize that Rose was also Charlotte’s great-grandmother’s first name.

Nicole’s name also came from Zach.  Zach left work early to go to her ultrasound and he said 5.8.10 Nicole Kate (1) that as he got into the car he thought to himself, “it’s going to be a girl and we’re going to name her Nicole.”  I was initially opposed to the name because I thought it was too common.  I loved how unique and familiar Charlotte’s name was and wanted something along the same lines as that, but eventually (while I was in labor and couldn’t think of a name I liked better that he’d accept) Zach convinced me that Nicole was not a common name for her generation.  I wasn’t initially thrilled with the choice, but the day Zach blessed her I changed my mind.  I remember him saying in the blessing how her name was in remembrance of Christ’s victory over death (Nicole is a french form of Victoria which means victory) and that brought tears to my eyes.

We chose her middle name Kate because it sounded good with Nicole and we wanted  something more interesting than the common middle names like Marie and Lynn (no offence to Heidi or anyone who named her).

I assume everyone knows by now who we named our Ila after.  I always liked her name, maybe it was partly because I loved my grandmother so much.  I felt close to her and yearned4.26.10 Ila (7) for more time with her throughout my life.  I actually tried to get Zach to agree to putting the name Ila in Nicole’s name, but we couldn’t come up with a first name that worked with Ila as a middle name and we weren’t fully convinced that we should use it as a first name.  We really struggled with finding a name for Ila.  Zach liked the name Mellissa, but I couldn’t be excited about that name.  We toyed around with several names and didn’t have a strong idea about what we  wanted to name her.  Jane was a name that I liked and was possibly at the top of my list for first names. 

Out here you have to set up an appointment with the hospital and register before going into labor.  The first step is to set up all of the billing information.  As I was giving my information to the lady she asked me about names and if we’d chosen a name yet.  I told her that we hadn’t and she continued to ask what names we had been thinking about.  I told her the list of names that we had discussed and somewhere in that discussion, I said that I had wanted to use the name Ila, but I couldn’t figure out a name to go with it.  Jane was also one of the names in that group and the lady suggested the name Ila Jane to me.  I instantly loved it and even told her so.  I wondered if Zach would agree to it, I was almost too  afraid to ask because I was so excited about the name.  I honestly could not wait to tell him the idea, but was very nervous that he’d reject it at the same time.  That night I presented the name to him.  I told him that me and the lady at registration had decided on a name for our baby and that I wanted him to think about the name while I showered and then I’d come back and he could tell me what he thought.  When I came back into our “wood room” after our shower, he instantly agreed to the name without further discussion.  I was so excited, but also afraid that he’d change his mind at the same time.  4.26.10 Ila (11)We agreed not to tell anyone about it before she was born.

Someone asked me what we were naming her just after she was born and as I said the name Ila, I instantly felt like maybe it wasn’t the right name, but after telling a few more people it started to sound right again and by the time I left the hospital I was feeling good about the name.  When my mom came she told me that we were at the hospital that they had taken my grandmother to after her stroke and that my grandmother’s room was even on the same floor.

As time has gone by, Ila’s name has increased in significance to me and I find myself more and more pleased with our choice.  I know that my kids will all know about my grandma and that as she grows,  Ila will want to know about the woman that she was named after.  The name is unique enough that she’ll probably be asked where it came from throughout her life.  I love that by using her name, my grandma will be remembered for generations more in a very personal way by Ila and by Ila’s children and maybe even by Ila’s grandchildren!

An unexpected consequence of naming her after my beloved grandmother is that I become emotional about hearing her name said in frustration and I have this increased desire for everyone to love her.   There is a connection to her name in that desire that I can’t entirely explain because I know she’s a different person, but it almost feels like when people love Ila, they also love my grandmother.

Grandma O’Bryant’s house Then and Now

I’ve wanted to go see my grandmother’s house since moving to Knoxville a few months ago, but I didn’t want to go alone so I waited until my sister Krista could come with me.

This is what the house used to look like and except for the fact that there were a lot more trees and other plants and a birdbath in the front yard, this is pretty much how I remember it looking

Grandma's house

Here’s the picture of what it looks like now

1.14.10 Grandma O'Bryant's house (2)The lady who lives there now was very kind and talked to us at length about the changes they had made and apologized for the roses and other things that didn’t survive.  It’s strange that she’s been there for ten years already because in my mind that house has always been my grandmother’s house and for some reason I had it in my head that she had just moved in.

Ila

I know you didn’t love your name, but that’s because to you it was just a name. To me it is the feeling of love that I felt when I was with you.

It’s a reminder of a great woman who I loved and admired. Who showed strength in motherhood through sorrows and joys.

A woman who, like me, thrills to be a mom and recognized her role as the most noble and worthwhile thing she could do.

It’s the thrill in my heart as we got closer to your house each time we drove to Knoxville to visit you. It’s the love that flowed from you to everyone you knew.

There is so much about you that I admire, but when I try to put into words what you meant to me, I can’t find the right words and the letters on the page fall short of the emotion I feel when I remember you.

So, here I sit with my precious, perfect little girl. In a place that I always wanted to be, but now find myself here without you and it seems so appropriate and perfect to be able to give this little angel your name. I miss you and I love you.

Your granddaughter,

Kathleen12.9.09 Ila

Whisked to Memory Lane. . .

There are some things that instantly remind me of a time or a place or a person.  Today cookies I was at the store and saw a box of ‘Danish Style Butter Cookies’ on sale and it instantly reminded me of my grandma O’Bryant.  During Christmas time, she always had a tin full of these little cookies that looked much like this picture with the pleated cupcake style papers and stacks of shaped cookies.  My favorites were the ones with the big pieces of sugar on top. 

I also can’t see someone throw pizza dough in the air without thinking of my grandpa O’Bryant or smell lilies without thinking of grandma.

**Hey Cousins:  Do any of you have a copy of that picture of grandpa in grandma’s kitchen throwing the pizza dough in the air?  I also want pictures that show any part of grandma’s room, the red room, or the basement.  I’m particularly interested in pictures of grandma’s ceramic painting tables or grandpa’s plane.

Grandma O’Bryant’s House, Part 3

I have no pictures for most of the next few rooms, unfortunately.  Grandma’s bedroom was at the end of the hall. I remember thinking that she had the softest bed in the world. Her blankets were a light turquoise and she had a headboard with shelves. She probably had books up there, but I only remember an alarm clock and lotion. I remember thinking her bedroom light was neat because she had a dimmer switch on it and I’d never seen one before. She had a tall dresser on the wall between the door and the closet where she kept a TV. She liked to turn the TV on sometimes to help herself fall asleep. On the other side of the bed was a tall bookshelf and a tall spinning chair like the kind in the living room (curved wood with patterned cushions). She had a dog bed in her room while Mitsey was still around. Across from the bed was a long dresser with a big mirror over it. She kept pictures of grandchildren on the bookshelf and on the dresser with the mirror. She had a bathroom with a shower, sink and toilet in her bedroom.

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A special memorial day experience

8.18.07 Grandma O'BryantLast August my dear grandmother passed away, so on Memorial day I wanted to visit her grave.  When she actually died, I was too emotional to talk about it with my kids so today was the first real experience I had to tell them about my grandmother and her death.  Charlotte didn’t say much, but Isaac was full of questions.  I told him stories about her one-eyed dog, Mitsey and about drinking root beer floats and watching movies.  He asked me questions about her and about death and resurrection in  general.  I wish I could have recorded every word because we had some very special touching moments and I felt good to be able to share my love of my grandmother with him.  He wants to make a flag to put in front of our house today that says “Grandma O’Bryant” because then everyone who sees it will know that we are remembering her today.

Inside Grandma O’Bryant’s house, part 2

**I could only find pictures of one of the rooms that I describe here, so I scattered pictures of that room throughout the descriptions of the others**

OBryant 0305 Through the kitchen was the opening to the hallway. I loved grandma’s hall. She kept giant bullion boards filled with pictures. She had an assortment of pictures old and new that she rotated and changed regularly. I must have spent hours in her hall just looking at pictures. She had framed pictures of all of her children when they were young and of all of their families as they got older. I loved to see how everyone grew and changed and to find treasures among the old pictures. It was fun to find pictures of my family scattered about in her collection. She had a wall hanging in the hall that listed all the birthdays in the family by month I used to study it to find out whose birthdays were close to mine and to see who had been added most recently.

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Inside Grandma O’Bryant’s house, part 1

playing Dr with Grandma OBryant (2) The door that we used most to go in and out of Grandma’s house was probably the back sliding door. As you walked in the door you were instantly surrounded by the dark wood paneling that covered the walls. There was a stone wall to the left with a fireplace and a stone ledge in front of the fireplace. In the corner where the stone wall met the wall with wall of the sliding door was grandma’s TV. It was the  kind that had a door that could cover it and big built in speakers. Grandma had a big collection of VHS movies that she had taped off of television. OBryant 0230My family didn’t get cable television until after I was married, so it was always amazing to me that I could watch a cartoon any time of the day at Grandma’s house. I thought Nickelodeon was wonderful. The living room furniture was unique. She had a wood coffee table that was rounded and curvy and the chairs and couch had an old log furniture style to them. The couch was made of rounded dark wood pieces that resembled logs with green stripped cushions. Our favorite chairs in her living room were a set of chairs made of curved log style wood with patterned cushions on them. They sat on a rounded base and could turn completely around. We loved to spin on them or spin siblings or cousins on them and I’m sure we were regularly cautioned about spinning them too fast or too recklessly.

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Tennessee Grandma, part 1 (mostly about outside her house)

We usually visited my Grandparents in TN twice a year, at Christmas time and once in the summer. They lived on Yarnell road just off of Campbell Station road. I remember Campbell StationFullscreen capture 252009 84549 PM-1 as a treacherous windy road with a cliff to one side and a forested hill on the other. The road was slightly slanted which made it particularly dangerous in the rain or when it was icy or snowy. There would often be a flowered cross at some point along the windy stretch of the road to signify the spot of a fatal accident. where multi accidents happens at a same time in such a case you can also consult attorneys for multi-vehicle accident charges as they can help you legally. One time we were visiting TN at the same time as our cousins from Texas (the Paynes) and they had a car accident on Campbell Station road on the way home from church. My cousin Jenni and both of her parents had to spend time in the hospital with serious injuries. Ironically there was a picture in the paper after the accident of my dad holding my little sister (Krista, I think). That accident was a particularly memorable experience for me because on the way to church my parents had let me ride with our cousins to church and they wouldn’t let us ride back to grandma’s house in their car after church. With the help of the lawyers from https://halelaw.com/sarasota-personal-injury-attorney/motorcycle-accidents site, my family was able to recover soon and was back in no time. You can also read by this link how to claim compensation with the help of injuries for the injuries sustained.

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Memories of my Grandmother

Today wasP1020896-1 the graveside service for my grandmother Ila Terry O’Bryant.  She was a remarkable woman.  From the time I was very young, I always remembered feeling an intense sense of love when I was around my grandmother.  As I got older, I longed for and cherished the moments I had with her.  I have felt a special closeness between us, partly because I was named after her first child who suffered a tragic death when she was 2. 

Grandma was a wonderful storyteller.  I loved to liOBryant 3210sten to her tell stories of her childhood and family life.  I remember when we’d go to visit, I’d  sometimes stay up and just listen as she talked with my mother.  When I was older she’d tell me stories and show me pictures.  I have fond memories of sitting on her bed listening to her tell stories.  She kept all her picture books in the front room and I enjoyed looking through them and imagining what life was like when she was young.

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Dealing with Death

This is an intensely personal subject for me, so this particular entry is not for the casual reader.  I feel an almost therapeutic need to describe my emotions and the events surrounding my grandmother’s death.  There are times when voiced words seem insufficient and bland, when only the written word can satisfy the need to pull out the emotions brimming beneath the surface–this, perhaps is one of those times.

On Friday August 1st at 8:00 AM my mother called me from Tennessee where she had justOBryant 2279 arrived the night before and told me that my grandmother had what they suspected was a stroke sometime during the night.  My thoughts were immediately turned to the idea that my grandmother was dying.  I remember another time that my grandmother was very sick and in the hospital and I wondered if it could possibly be the end, my thoughts were different this time than they had been before, it was as if I already knew that this was the end.  I knew it inside, but felt the lack of confidence in speaking those words.  So as I went about my day, the words ‘my grandma is dying’ seemed to echo in my head constantly.  I stood in line at the post office and when I looked over at the elderly lady next to me I thought ‘my grandma is dying’ and I started to cry.  At the gym as I peddled on the bike I thought ‘my grandma is dying’ and I cried again. 

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